It’s Not Disobedience, It’s Dialog. Choosing to say, “What you think matters.”
I wanted to spend a couple of hours with Riley before leaving to teach a Horse Speak/Centered Riding Retreat in Wyoming. While getting him (and myself) some exercise was one thing I thought we should focus on, I also wanted it to be enjoyable for both of us. I wasn’t feeling physically up to a lot of work, to be honest, and I wasn’t sure what he felt up to.
Me: We should probably do some lunging for a warm-up
Riley: I’m not really interested in having you attach the lunge line (Standing still but turned head slightly away). Could I get it done? Yup! But I thought, why not listen to what he has in mind………..
He started to walk, changed directions, and approached the 3 ground poles, stepping over each of them. I said, “Okay, so you want to walk over poles.”
Then I walked along, and he walked with me. He then approached a small stack of cones and offered to pick them up; it’s a trick we play. Just before touching them, he pulled his head back; wasps had begun a nest. I threw it and the wasps. We wandered back to the whips and lunge lines.
Still not interested in the lunge line, he walked off again. I went with him and invited him to follow me and do a liberty circle at the walk. He did it. Then he left and went over to push a big ball. Then I walked, and he followed. When I stopped, he kept going a few more feet, stopping me at the girth button-Connect/time to ride.
Mounting block-not so much
Trot circle at liberty-a great job!
Mounting block not so much.
Bridle up, walk to woods-stump mounting block-yes!
After a nice ride, I put him back in the paddock. He stood with me for a while before joining the herd. That says it all.
It’s not disobedience, it’s dialog. Healthy relationships include compromise, listening, taking turns, and creating situations that we both can happily agree on. If we use force and overpower, then we are saying that what you think does not matter. Choose your path. If relationship is what you value most, then learning Horse Speak opens that door.